Monday, April 21, 2008

Why is the sky blue?

How do flowers grow? Where do babies come from? Why did my goldfish go away? Where is Reese's daddy? The question that come from small children. Every parent knows they will have to answer the questions that come from their children. But I now find myself having to answer the question that comes from other peoples children.

Reese has never asked me about her dad. She knows her friends have a person named Dad. She's played with Neil and Wes. But never once asked where hers is. However apparently other children are now asking and their parents are turning to me to tell them how to answer. Most have given me the reason of wanting consistency. They want to tell their kids the same thing Reese is told so there are no conflicts later in life. I guess I appreciate that. But I guess I just wasn't ready to think about what to say.

My mom has a friend in PA. She is younger than my mom and kinda her adopted daughter. Lisa has 4 children who call my mom Grammy Beth. There are 2 girls age 10, a boy age 8 and another boy age 6. They all came down to visit me after Reese was born and the kids hear funny stories about Reese from my mom when she calls them. A few months ago Lisa was driving with all four kids in the car. When Philip the 8 yr old boy asks "Mommy where is Reese's Daddy" As Lisa relates the story to my mom her internal response was "Dammit Clare what am I supposed to tell my kids" Luckily before she had to answer one of the twins replied "Clare is still looking for her Prince Charming and he will be Reese's daddy"

My mom told me the story b/c she thought Helen's line was so cute. She didn't even think about the line that went through Lisa's head. I understand that no parent looks at their daughter while she's growing up and says "I hope she becomes a single mom" and I know my situation is not ideal. But it really sucks to have it relayed to me by more than one set of parents that they feel awkward having to talk about me. Like I'm an "issue" they have to deal with. Telling their kids about Reese's daddy is as uncomfortable as the thought of having the sex talk with their kids.

Joanne talked last night about having wisdom and how we shouldn't worry about having the right words when people ask us about our faith because at that time God will speak through us. I know that Reese was sent by God so I have always felt that when she asked me He would help me know what to say. But know the question has come and it's not from her. So I will spend some time praying to figure out what to say. I welcome advice from anyone out there.

Friday, April 11, 2008

heading to PA

So we are leaving this afternoon for Pittsburg for my Uncle's funeral. I will be doing one of the readings since he was my GodFather. I don;t know which one I'm doing so I'm gonna include both here.

Romans 6:3-4,8-9

3 Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
8 Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. 9 We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him.

Isaiah 25:6-9

6 On this mountain the Lord of hosts will make for all peoples a feast of rich food, a feast of well-aged wine,of rich food full of marrow, of aged wine well refined.7 And he will swallow up on this mountainthe covering that is cast over all peoples,the veil that is spread over all nations.8 He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces,and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth,for the Lord has spoken.9 It will be said on that day,“Behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, that he might save us.This is the Lord; we have waited for him;let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation.”

Please pray for my family tomorrow. Also pray for my Aunt to help her sell her house. She and my Uncle had already been in the process of trying to sell and move to SC to be with thier daughter and my Aunt's step-mother. But thier house is over 40 years old and needed alot of work to make it desireable. Needless to say most of the work was being done by my uncle. Now there are 1/2 finished projects everywhere. It's hard for my Aunt to finish them herself and she really wants to move out of the house. So help her find a family that is looking for a house they can fix and work on so that she can go be with her family and not be stressed about the house in PA.

Funny Reese story time: Reese just switched DayCares. She now goes to a school in Frederick near me b/c her's was shutdown after a fire (on the weekend noone was hurt) So I asked her yesterday while we driving home to tell me about her new classmates and what thier names are. She answers "Ummm Sarah (that might be true), Danny (that's not true, that is my old boss), Baby Jesus (well I know Jesus is in her class room since he's everywhere), Bandit (our cat), and Monkey (her new stuffed animal from Aunt Anne at the Zoo)" I asked her the same question later around my Mom and she answered the same way. Way too cute!

Friday, April 4, 2008

Funny Reese Stuff

So after everything with my Uncle, HIllary's dad, and my friends mom I decided we ll needed to laugh a little so here is a funny story about Reese from today.

To start it off I have to explain for those who don't know Our neighbor (Kris) and my sister-in-law are both pregnant and Reese knows they have baby's in thier belly. Also Reese calls gummie snacks Chewy Vitmains b/c they look like her vitamins. Finally Blake is Hillary's 11 month old son.

So today Reese and Iwent to the grocery store. She had a bag of gummie snacks but ate them really quickly (I mean who doesn't). So when she finished she said "Mommy need more chexy vitamins" I said "No honey, you ate them already" She replied "No they are at home" I told her "No honey you ate them, they are in your belly" to which she replied" No my baby in my belly" I laughed and thought we were done but no.

Later that night when I was putting her to sleep again she tells me she has a baby in her belly. I told her she didn't and Aunt Elaine did so Sami would be a big sister. She replies "I already a big sister, baby sister down stairs" I said "No. . . your baby dolls are down stairs" She got very upset and said "No baby sister" So curious I asked "What is your baby sisters name?" And she replies "Blake"

I sure Hillary would love the fact that her son is apparently actually a girl. Hillary and I are close and all but last I checked Blake was in fact hers not mine (although if my SWF plans go though that will change, lol). Hopfully this will bring a smile to people who read it, especially those of us who haven't been smiling enough lately.

RIP John Christian

My dad just told me that my Uncle John passed away last night. My parents had ben thinking about going up this weekend but felt it in thier hearts to go sooner so they saw him yesterday. They said he was basically in a coma and barely responded to thier voices. As I've said before it is a blessing he did not suffer long. His first scan was March 17th and he was even fully diagnosed until a few days after that.

It's hard for me to process my feelings. My family is close but still we only saw my dad's family maybe once a year, lately even less since they've been spending more time in SC that PA. So I know he's gone but I don't think I will really feel it until his funeral. My Aunt and him had been trying to sell thier house and move to SC where thier daughter and her family as well as my Dad's step-mom live. So I'm sure this will advance those plans more since Aunt Ellen will not want to stay in PA alone.

Thank you to everyone for your kind prayers. I will update to when the furneral is going to be. Reese is only 2 yet this will be her second furneral. I am glad she is too young to really process what is going on b/c I'm not ready to talk about death with her. My cousin does not have that liberty. Thier daughter Hayley is 5. She adores grandpa John and will be devestated to know she will never see him again. Also as I mentioned Uncle John's mother is still alive. At 90 yrs old dealing with the thought of buring your son cannot be easy.

Please pray for my cousin and my Aunt that they will know Uncle John is in heaven feeling no pain and bringing joy to everyone there with his deep laugh, huge smile, and kind heart.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Uncle Update

So my parents spoke to my cousin today. My uncle is doing very badly. The cancer is in his stomach, lungs, esophogus, and bones. He can barely drink water to take his meds. We don't know if he has an IV for meds. They are transporting him from Ohio back to his home in Pittsburg by Ambulance and then he will be at home w/ hospice care. He has a morphne pump for the pain. My Mom and Dad were going to go up next weekend but they don't know if he will last that long so they might go this weekend instead.

As I said before it's a blessing and a curse that it is progressing this fast. I am happy he is not going to suffer for to long but I am still in shock about the whole thing. I think by the time it really hits me that he is sick I will be at his funeral.