Being the Baby of the Family

So after rereading my post last night I feel like I should expand a little more about why loosing this name means alot to me.

I am the baby of my family by 5 years. All the babies out there can relate to me, especially if there is a big difference in ages. When I was 12 my grandmother (the one who maiden name was Carter) died. At that time my grandfather moved down here and my mom and her sisters began dividing up the furniture in the house b/c my grandfather was getting an apartment and didn't really need as much.

I didn't really pay much attention to the process and what was going on except that my mom and her sisters were fighting alot and it actually caused a huge fight in our family that was only resolved last year at Pop-Pop's funeral. But that is a different story.

Anyway fast-forward to a few years ago. I was chatting with my mom about the stuff in our house that had come from Grammy and Pop-Pop's house and I mentioned how I really loved this one sideboard in the house. And my mom replies "Oh your sister already gets that she asked for if years ago" Then I comment on a desk that my grandfather built "Oh your brother already asked for that and alot of the stuff Pop-Pop built b/c they were really close" All these requests were made back when I was 12 and they were 17 and 20. Because I was to young and didn't know what was going on my mom already promised away alot of the pieces from their house.

I am not materialistic in any way, it's not about who gets more stuff. It's more that b/c they are older apparently their memories are better than mine so they automatically get some of the things. Granted some of my memories with the furniture is only of it being in my house. But the desk for example I have always loved but I was too young to know I had to start "claiming" things. And now it doesn't matter b/c some items have already been physically given away not just verbally promised.

After the affair w/ my mom's family she has mentioned several times that they would create a list of item in the house and then we can all go through and mark what we want and how badly we want it. Then together my Mom and Dad would compare the lists and try to split things up evenly and fairly. They still haven't done this but I hope they do soon. I have already seen what might happen when they do move or one/both of them pass away. When Pop-Pop died and we had to distribute the last of his things we had to decide what to do w/ the grandfather clock he had built. We have one in our house that he built as well. Needless to say all three children on my Mom's side wanted to have one to remember Pop-Pop by (none of the other grandchildren wanted either of them). In the end my brother got the clock from his apt and I get the one in our house but I had to remind my mom that Meg and Jon each already have 2 pieces in their house and another 2 pieces at our house promised to them while I only have 1.

I know that sounds materialistic b/c I am counting by numbers but in this sense I think comparing the number of pieces was a fair decision since we only had 2 days to decide. When we do the big split I am sure there will be things that mean alot to someone and they will pick that one thing over 3 other things.

Ok so hopefully now everyone can see how there was only one thing I "claimed" back when Grammy died. Not any furniture or physical mementos. But he dream of carrying on her name. And once again my big brother took it away b/c he had a boy first.